My parents are not doing anything since over a week.
So was it all a misunderstanding?
I’m not really sure. I’m happy there is harmony at home now.
Today I listened to “look what you made me do” in front of my dad and I started to get anxious thinking if he thought I’m playing it for him.
I wasn’t. I don’t hate my parents.
I love and care for them and always wait for them to reciprocate.
I was angry in the past, yes. The circumstances and situation was as such. There was immense bullshit, which I was clearing one by one.
I’m happy these days. I’m happy that I spoke about everything that happened. It’s like a weight has lifted.
I am heartbroken and sometimes sad. But mostly I’m happy and find joys even though there are problems.
Having a kid in the house is bliss. I’m so blessed to have two.
Sometimes I get anxious when I speak because people put meaning behind my words and actions. I don’t know why that is?
I’m always clear and direct.
I don’t know, the bullshit that happened to me still haunts me, it might always be lurking somewhere in my mind, I’m afraid.
I just have to be brave enough to move forward even if it does and try not to let it consume me. The intensity is so less now, it’s manageable.
I can just brush the thought aside and think about something good instead.
Ginny is my favorite thought. I love thinking about her but I always start to cry.
I’m not getting sleep now. I want to listen to my sleep song and lay down.
Goodnight.