rachana rajan <3

I saw reels online of Taylor Swift looking at the crowd with the caption “she won” 2 months ago.

So I used the same words that “I won” because I knew for a fact that was meant for me.

Because things were going good 2 months ago.

So I thought okay I won the battle.

…

All this started because of what happened at the restaurant and certain miscommunication and misunderstandings.

Whenever something goes wrong when I go somewhere, I tend to write a review about it.

Which I’ve seen a lot of people do including Ginny.

I guess given the circumstances that I’m in, I should have been careful with my words and also I should learn to ignore certain things.

Because when I say something, the whole world gets to know about it and it becomes huge and blown out of proportion.

I have learnt from my mistakes and learnt that I have to be a bit careful with my each and every interaction considering my position and the consequences involved.

Anyway, I have no idea why this is being streched so badly even after addressing each and every thing.

I don’t know why people keep taunting me this way as well.

It is getting too overwhelming and draining, tbh.

I do not deserve this.

People involved Ginny in all this and I don’t really feel good about it because I have a constant ache in my heart now.

It’s getting too much to handle.

My therapist used the word game changer and I saw that online as well.

I do not know why this is happening.

I don’t know if this is a court case or an investigation or people are just expecting me to rekindle the friendships or what exactly.

I can just assume things because I do not know.

I already said that, whatever people want to know I’m ready to answer and show the truth.

I don’t understand the scrutiny behind it though.

I’m forgetting things again and I miss Ginny a lot so I don’t feel good.

I’ve lost weight and my throat is not completely fine.

I’m too worked up. I have nothing more to say or give.

I do know I’m different, I realised that after I started doing YouTube.

I realised all my mistakes while speaking and learnt everything about what to say and how to say etc.

I grew as a person after putting myself out there for so long.

There has been so many mishaps but yeah, I learnt from it.

I keep thinking about Ginny all the time. I’m so fed up of what’s happening, I just want to speak to her.

I’m soo sleepy.