Note.

I’ve been saying “God saw what you did” to the people who wronged me since a really long time.

I didn’t even know to speak back then.

I didn’t even know I would be able to prove myself one day.

All my life, no one I liked has loved me because I was crazy and I met Ginny who didn’t care about the fact, exactly at the right time.

She said she wants to marry me exactly at the right time.

I was so so angry when I lost her. I was screaming and going to die with anger.

In my dream God said, mother didn’t do anything.

I had this dream exactly at the right time.

I didn’t know anything back then. About what happened or what was happening.

But my anger suddenly stopped.

After that dream I wasn’t angry but mother was constantly stabbing me so I reacted that’s all.

I don’t know why I kept telling those people God saw what you did.

I don’t know what made me say this.

It was as though, God was with me.

All these things comes out of me naturally.

Whatever I wrote here.

Most of it, I don’t even think about it prior to writing here.

I don’t know why the capacity to love is still inside me, no matter what happened to me.

I’m trying to make sense of things.

But I’m unable to understand how it all happened.

Even I don’t know for sure if God exists but everything that happened, I’m unable to explain it.

I’ve believed in Him since childhood and spoke to Him continuously.

I was a child, I didn’t know anything and I didn’t have anyone to speak to.

So I made Him my friend.

Is it my belief that got me here or is it that He is really there.

I don’t know.

Honestly, I’m scared.