You should fight for a relationship/friendship only if there is a connection and rapport.
Connection meaning, both of you were interested and invested in the relationship/friendship.
There is a theory in himym, which Ted Mosby explains as “Dobler-Dahmer”.
If there is connection and rapport and you fight for it, it’s cute.
Hence Dobler.
If there was no connection and rapport and you are fighting for it.
It’s harassment, stalking and aggressive psychopathic.
Hence Dahmer.
Everyone knows me but to me everyone are strangers.
When I casually smile or speak, people feel a sense of connection and behave like we are long lost best friends.
Because everyone knows everything about me.
But to me everyone are strangers and I don’t feel that connection.
Because there will be nothing between us.
Friend is a valuable word for me, I take a lot of time to give that label to someone.
Alot of time.
So when I’m clearly saying that I’m not interested, you need to stay away.
Because there would be no connection and rapport.
So when you encroach on my space and boundaries even after that,
it becomes stalking and harassment.
Hence Dahmer.
It’s because of the reality that I’m existing in that people don’t know how to behave around me.
They feel it’s okay to cross my boundaries and space.
They feel it’s okay to encroach my space and boundaries and force.
They feel it’s okay to misbehave because with me they don’t have to face any consequences.
The world was enabling this kinda behaviour.
You can clearly understand this from what happened to me my whole life up until last year.
When I was trying to explain this last year, people around me were brutally gaslighting me.
Hence I’m putting my foot down and ending this once and for all.
Enough is enough.
I’ve been extremely clear about my boundaries.
I have explained everything multiple times.
Enough is fucking enough.
rachana rajan <3 