I’ve had an extremely social life.
I’ve spoken to and texted countless people.
I’ve spoken to a lot of people casually.
Like a lot.
My conversations have always been surface level with these people.
Everyone I speak to casually are not my fucking friends.
I don’t use the word friend loosely.
I have spoken to countless people.
But very few people I’ve connected with.
I’ve had very few friends.
I don’t open up easily.
I don’t trust anyone easily.
Ginny, my therapist Kruti and Will Newman.
Are the only people who actually saw me.
For me.
In my 35 years of life.
There has been no one else.
No one else.
There has been no one else worthy of the word friend.
There were a few other casual friends who were good to me.
But I’ve had real genuine connection and rapport with only them.
I’ve already said why they are important to me.
Why they are in my close circle.
People in my close circle are in my close circle for a reason.
It takes a lot to call someone a friend.
A friend is a valuable word.
I’ve already given you my definition of the word.
I’m extremely picky when it comes to my romantic likings.
I’m equally picky when it comes to friendships too.
I wasn’t like this before.
When I started off.
I made a lot of mistakes.
I learnt the hard way that people can’t be trusted.
Hence whenever I speak to someone new.
My one leg is always outside the door.
I’m always evaluating.
When something doesn’t add up or feels off.
I bolt.
I always end this peacefully.
I never start shit.
rachana rajan <3 