I’ve been waking up angry for the last 2 years.
Because of whatever is going on.
To regulate my anger in the morning.
I’ve been going for morning walks.
I distribute my 10k throughout the day.
I walk after each meal.
That’s how I have been hitting 10k.
I never really miss.
Anyway.
Yesterday mom said something silly as soon as I woke up.
I lost my temper completely.
Because as I mentioned.
I wake up angry.
Mom was crying.
I felt like shit.
Also the incidents with Dhruv and Neethu.
My day was completely fucked.
I was fucked.
I was trauma dumping on Teni Thomas.
I rarely trauma dump.
But yesterday was an abomination.
Teni listened and was there for me.
I’m glad to have him as a friend.
Today my mind is clearer.
I booked an appointment with my therapist for tomorrow.
I borrowed money from Will Newman for it.
I never ever borrow money from Will.
There’s a first to everything.
It felt weird asking him for money.
He was happy to help.
But I never want to do that again.
I don’t like asking my friends money.
Desperate times calls for desperate measures, I suppose.
So yeah.
I’m waiting to speak to my therapist tomorrow.
I explained to my mom about my early morning anger issues.
I said to her that I was wrong and it was my fault.
She didn’t do anything wrong.
I was projecting.
Today was clearer skies and cold winds.
I’m grateful for it.
